What Motivates You at Work?

Have you ever thought about what motivates you? What gets—and keeps—you going? When we know WHY we do something, we can use that information to accomplish more. Knowing what motivates us will help us achieve our goals, both personal and professional.



No matter what we do for a living, or where we do it, what motivates us can be found in the following list. Many of us believe that the only reason we work is money. Although there is no question that money, or what it buys (rent, food, etcetera) is a prime motivator, money alone does not create the sense of fulfillment and accomplishment that many of us are seeking.



LIMRA International, a research association, suggests you prioritize the following motivators for yourself. Once you've identified what works for you, share it with your boss. If you're the boss, ask your employees to prioritize their motivators. Whether you're the boss, the employee, or it's just you (a work-at-home mom or a solopreneur), this is important information for you to know.



INDEPENDENCE: The freedom to run your business activities as you wish; the opportunity to "be your own boss.”Do you ever feel restricted? Do you feel overcome by rules and red tape? Do you often feel in disagreement with superiors?


RECOGNITION: The tangible rewards you get for doing a job well, such as being singled out in a publication or speech. How important is winning to you? How do you feel when others receive recognition? Do you go out of your way to win awards?


ACHIEVEMENT: The feeling that you get from successfully accomplishing a job...overcoming obstacles and obtaining goals.Is your performance relative to your effort? How do you feel when you have completed a task? What kind of goals do you set for yourself?


LEISURE TIME: The amount of time that you have free to use as you wish and the extent of enjoyment that you get from this time.Do you find yourself neglecting things? Have you postponed a desired activity? Do you really enjoy your leisure me?


POWER: The sense of control that you feel you have over your destiny and the destiny of others...your feelings of influence to direct the behavior of others.Do you feel that you have control over your destiny? Do people tend to lean on you, ask your approval? Do you find yourself doing things you'd rather not do?


PRESTIGE: The respect accorded you by your peers and by business or community associates...how others feel you compare with your peers.Is prestige important to you? Do others tend to hold you in esteem? Do you find yourself performing to gain esteem?


MONEY: The amount of personal financial income provided by your job.Are you proud of what you earn? Do you tend to talk about money or how you spend, save, or invest it?


PRESSURE: The constant feeling or need to show continuing improvement in your job performance.Do you feel guilty about not exerting enough effort? Do you continually feel that you must do more? Do you want continual motivation from superiors?


SELF ESTEEM: Your feeling of self-worth...how you feel you measure up to your peers.Are you confident that you do as well as you can? Do you feel guilty about poor performance? Are you satisfied with your performance?


FAMILY LIFE: The amount and quality of family activities that you engage in.Do you spend enough time with your family? Is time meaningful when with them? Do they talk about the time that you spend with them?


SECURITY: The certainty that you feel of maintaining your position...the feeling that tomorrow will be at least as good as today.Is job security important to you? Are you afraid to try something new? Do you do things that tend to secure your job?


PERSONAL GROWTH: The feeling of growing as an individual or becoming more competent, more efficient—a better person.Do you think that you have grown over the past year? Do you do specific things that result in improvement? Do you have plans for doing more?
Now that you've prioritized this list, you have clear idea of what motivates you at work. It's not just money, is it?

Are You Living the Life You Want?

Tired of not getting what you want in one or more major areas in your life? Are you living a life that is not exactly as you planned? Have you given up on what you used to want?

You are entitled to a life that works! One full of passionate and satisfying experiences.

When is the last time someone asked you what you wanted? Maybe the waiter in a restaurant? Or the butcher at the supermarket? Who looks after your needs as you take care of your kids, your husband, your parents, your house, your boss, your laundry. . .?

Is anyone putting you first in their life? Probably not. Maybe not even you. This may be shocking, but you need to put yourself first. Yes, first. Even before the kids. Certainly before your husband. You need to take care of yourself and "fill your gas tank," or no one else will. If you are running on empty, you are not much help to others. So, that means taking time out to breath, to think, to relax, to plan. . . and to dream.

If you are ready to dream, let "up the ante," so to speak, to the next level. What do you really want? And, I don mean for dinner tonight. Nor, do I mean which color blouse to purchase or what movie to see on Friday night. I mean, "WHAT DO YOU WANT?!!" in life.

What I know about women, is that often there is no time or space left in life to consider the answer to this question. Never mind being able to spend quality time really pondering this question or planning how to pursue the revelations you come up with!

So, how do you envision significant, satisfying changes in your life and then make them happen? Follow me! Start by, just for a moment, freeing yourself from the attachments of family, relationship, responsibilities, pressures, and worry. . . let them go from your mind.

Find a relaxing place to sit. Close your eyes. Take a deep breath or two. Remember, you put your worries and responsibilities aside. Let the "realities" of life go. Forget about the places you need to be. Forget the things you need to do, the schedules, and the commitments. I challenge you to also put aside the restrictions to having what you want. I know there are many of them. Just let them go! Let yourself float away . . .from this life that is currently yours.

In your mind, float up above your body, out of the building you are in, and to a peaceful location. It might be nearby - somewhere you like to spend time. From this place, look down at your life. What would you have in your life if you could have anything? What do you love in your life? What would you keep no matter what? What don you love? What would you change? What would you let go of?

What would your house be like? How would you decorate it? Where would it be located? What else would you change about your house to feel nurtured, happy, and safe there? Take a moment to picture it. See the details. Let out the stops!

Now, look at your family. How would family life be? What does the time with your kids look like? What does the time away from your kids look like? How do you want your relationships with all family members to be? Sit for a moment with the visions.

What would your job look like? Do you have one? Are you a full-time mom? Do you work at home? Would you change careers? Spend a few minutes thinking about the details for your dream job. Go with them, no matter how crazy or unrealistic they might seem. If you could have a career doing what would make you happier than anything else, what would it be?

(Hint: What do you love to do that you feel you must do. What is it you do easily that others do not? Does the thought of being able to make a living from it bring up fears? GREAT! This is it! You have found your passion.

What about your marriage, relationship, or the relationship you wish you had? What would this look like? What would your significant other be like? How would he treat you? Feel how you want to feel with this person. Envision what you would do together and what you would share. Feel the passion and closeness between you.

Finally, let yourself think about any other important aspects of your life, such as your friendships, community service, travel, recreation, or your spiritual beliefs. How would these components be if they were as you desired? Leave your skeptic on the sidelines! (You can have her back in a few minutes!) Let yourself sneak a glance at your desires, dreams, passions, and secret fantasies. Look at the details. . . notice what you see. Any surprises? Take a deep breath and maybe congratulate yourself for being willing to look into this place.

If you came up with a satisfying vision, I invite you to write it down. You might even start an "I WANT" journal. In it, you can list all the details that came to mind. Then, add to it over time. I suggest you also write about the fears, judgements, and reactions you experienced. For example, "This is too selfish" or "I can have this, so why bother thinking about it!" are typical reactions. Just notice your thoughts and jot them down. Writing the objections clears the space to let the desires come to the surface so you can also write them down!

So, this is the first step in getting what you want - letting yourself see it. Find a way to make this practice part of your daily routine. Watch the changes start to happen!

THINGS A WOMAN WILL APPRECIATE FROM YOU

Walk with her,don't try to rule her

Offer your support, be a haven she can come to when she is in need, without fear of lectures or disinterest on your side

Don't ridicule her behind her back.I never understand men who do this.

Listen, listen ,when she is hurting. Resist the urge to offer advice unless she asks.

Give her compliments,make her feel good about herself, mean it.

Walk with her,not ahead of her.

Never take her for granted,don't let familiarity seep in.

Show your joy in spending time with her.A woman needs to feel appreciated.

Be honest with her. A woman never forgets.

Be her greatest supporter. Be someone she knows that she can always count on.

If you have done something to hurt her, even if you didn't mean to, tell her you are sorry

If anger gets the better of you walk away and take time to cool down,or you might say something you will regret and she will remember

You don't have to try to "fix" everything. Men are fixers, but women don't want you to fix everything.

Kiss her goodbye and be happy to see her

Understand her need to share herself with her friends. It's not that you aren't enough.

Show her she can count on you to get things done when you say you will

.Back her up "100" percent!

Don't ignore her to gain her attention.That just infuriates her

Include her in your dreams tell her about them. A woman feels part of you when you share your life even more with her.

If you treat her the way she deserves to be treated she in turn will give back to you 100 fold.A happy caring guy makes a happy caring woman.

Don't compare her to other women.She is unique.

100 Questions to Ask on a Date.

The first, second and even third dates can be awkward. Do you find yourself stuck in uncomfortable silences wondering what to say next? Once you find out a little bit of background about your date, where do you go next? What questions are too personal at this stage in the game? I've complied a list of 100 ice-breaking questions to ask on a date. Of course you don't want to try and cram in all 100 of these questions, or even 50 for that matter. Where the conversation goes is dependant on your date's specific background, career and lifestyle. So pick and choose carefully. You should only need to a few of these in your back pocket to really get a conversation going. Good luck!

1. What was your best job?

2. What were your worst jobs?

3. Tell me all the places you worked

4. Tell me about your best friend

5. Tell me about your family

6. Tell me about your relatives

7. What was your first car?

8. Favorite movie star?

9. Favorite entertainer?

10. Favorite song?

11. What were your life changing moments?

12. First girlfriend/boyfriend?

13. First kiss?

14. What is the dumbest thing you have ever done?

15. Have you ever been arrested?

16. Political affiliation?

17. Have you voted for someone you wished you hadn't?

18. Have you used drugs?

19. Do you like to shop?

20. Best way to relax?

21. Favorite thing to do alone?

22. Ever had a one night stand?

23. Do you save money?

24. What hobbies to you spend money on?

25. If you found a $100 what would you do?

26. Do you want children/more children?

27. Are you a good parent?

28. What makes a good parent?

29. Are you romantic?

30. Ever loose a pet?

31. Dog or cat?

32. Pets growing up?

33. Sleep in the nude?

34. Favorite midnight snack?

35. Do you exercise?

36. Did you ever see your parents making love?

37. Peanut butter and what?

38. What is one food you will never give up?

39. What is a food you can live without?

40. Favorite drink?

41. Perfect day?

42. How many cds do you own?

43. How many dvds to you own?

44. Favorite thing to spend money on?

45. What is the weirdest thing about you?

46. What is on your bedside table?

47. Are you cheap or thrifty?

48. Ever been in love with 2 people at the same time?

49. Grades in high school?

50. Favorite teacher and why?

51. Relatives in jail?

52. Toppings on pizza?

53. Black or white?

54. Glass half full or half empty?

55. Ever been to a food shelf?

56. Ever milked a cow?

57. Ever tipped a cow?

58. Bath or shower?

59. Mountains or the beach?

60. Plane, train or automobile?

61. Favorite all time movie?

62. Worse movie you have ever seen?

63. Best concert you have been to?

64. Beer, wine or coffee?

65. Best vacation?

66. If you could retire tomorrow what would you do?

67. Worse vacation?

68. Three places you would love to visit?

69. Worse boss?

70. If you could do anything what would it be?

71. Super powers you wish you had?

72. Ever had a massage?

73. Ideal romantic dinner?

74. Dumbest purchase you ever made?

75. Where did you find money when you were flat broke?

76. Ever sold blood?

77. What sporting event/concert/entertainment would you buy tickets to regardless of price?

78. Ever hit a jackpot on a slot machine?

79. Ever won the lottery?

80. What would you do with your lottery winnings?

81. Are you a neat freak?

82. Can't stand being around people who_________?

83. Crowds or small groups?

84. How old do you want to live to?

85. Loose your sight or hearing?

86. Ever had a crush on a member of the same sex?

87. Pet peeves?

88. Most annoying habit?

89. Sexiest parts of a member of the opposite sex?

90. Major turn offs?

91. Tattoos?

93. Piercings?

94. Plastic surgery--would you/have you?

95. Computer geek?

96. Trekee?

97. Play an instrument?

98. Been in a band?

99. Most embarrassing moment?

100. Nude beach yes or no?

Live Life to the Fullest

Do not miss out on the really important things in life. This life is short, so consider how you can really LIVE it.

There are few things in life that are irreplaceable and no matter what you should never let anything else in life become secondary to it. I do not know if you will agree to this or not, but there certain things you should always remember when you prioritize:

Remember why you are working: Most people work so that they can provide comforts to their families or to themselves. But somewhere along the line, they get so busy in the work that they forget to enjoy. If you do not spend time with your family, no matter how hard you work, it is useless. Nothing can replace you. Money is essential, but it is essential for the things it gets. Money by itself is not important.

Value the “Days”: The Birthdays, the Valentine’s Day, Christmas, New Year, Independence Day etc are all important because they are there to remind us about something or someone. These events or persons are important to us. We might never express our sentiments otherwise or we might just not get enough time or we may never take a break. These special days are important, cherish them.

Don’t get lost: Have you spent time with yourself lately? Never get so busy with your routine that you cannot take a few moments off for yourself. Nobody else can value you more than you do. So, stay alone for a few minutes everyday.

A kid is a kid only once: Children grow up faster than you know it. Right now you might be pushing them away, you might not have enough energy to tell them a story. But a day will come when they will be all grown up and you would wish you could hold them on your lap, cuddle them and tell them a tale just to see their expressions change. But they would not be around you for that anymore.

Don’t take life too seriously: This is the most important thing to remember- as long as you are not causing harm to anyone and as long as it is not at the cost of your responsibility, there is no reason for you not to have a little fun. Enjoy while you can. Life is way too serious to be taken seriously. If you do take life seriously, you just might not be able to live it.